There comes a time in every grad student’s life; that they look back and wonder if they should have started their thesis a few months back. This more often than not happens during the few months before they hope to graduate. And this gentleman and ladies is my story.
There are many signs that you better get up from your lazy ass and start working before you get kicked out, or worse, lose your job offers because you can’t graduate. Well, since I have suffered already, I will save you all future agony of realizing things too late.
Just follow my point-guide system. (if you read cosmopolitan way too often for your gender, you'd know what to do). For those who don't, all you need to do is select an answer and then later sum up the number within brackets and read the section below the questions for interpretations.
- How good is your social life?
- You can differentiate between Saturday and Tuesday just by looking out of your lab window (-4)
- You talk to the occasional opposite-sex person (0)
- You tell them about your progress in your thesis (-1)
- All local bouncers know your last name (+6)
- Can you play any musical instrument?
- I designed one with a FPGA board, I can sorta play that (-8)
- I know this person, who can play guitar (0)
- I play 6 instruments, and sometimes with red bull, all at once. (+7)
- Do you know what the bell curve of grading is?
- I am too busy submitting assignments and writing research proposals to care about that (-5)
- I know what a bell is, and i also know what a curve is. Hence by rule of mathematical deductions, i know what a bell curve is (+2)
- You kidding? I plot them on excel daily, to see the inverse slope and my standings in the class.(0)
- Describe your School newspaper
- We have one? (-3)
- Sorta in black and white (0)
- Describe? I design it weekly, I am the chief editor and the best reporter they have. (+5)
- Have you travelled much?
- Well, yeah, I find my way well to Starbucks and my lab. (-2)
- Yup, few places close by, during fall and spring breaks. (0)
- I have been to more cities here than my total number of credit hours (+5)
- What do you do for exercise?
- Yeah, the occasional basketball to keep fit. (0)
- Well, i run around trying to find my advisor. (-4)
- Wii-fit for body, PSP for hands, guitar hero for abs, wii tennis for arms. (+5)
- What websites do you visit frequently?
- Weather ones, just to check if its too cold to walk back home. (-2)
- Just my emails, to see if my advisor has mailed (0)
- rentacoder .com to see if someone has placed a bid on my thesis project. (+5)
- How good is your cooking?
- I can boil water (-2)
- I love take away food (0)
- When my mom came to visit, she had tears of joy in her eyes to learn that I cook better than her (+10)
Ok, now that you have answered all questions, let me give you an easy way to interpret these results.
If your total is less than 0.- You have way too much time reading stupid articles online, you need to concentrate on your thesis.If your total is 0.- This could be your total marks if you continue taking lame tests online.If your total is greater than 0.- It's a wonder you took enough time to take this test, the same effort and time on your thesis will ensure you graduate.
If your total is equal to 45 points.
- You need to stop writing weird tests on your blog and get back to the real world and start working on your thesis.
