I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons.

I started working on the 8th of July, well this is kinda like my first job, if you don’t count the part time things I used to do. I mean, frankly, charging your mom to eat her cooking was just too mean, but hey, it was hard earned money… The company I work for ( well not so much work as sitting, acting busy, drinking cappuccinos and cafĂ© lattes ) decided it was time to teach ‘freshers’ about money management.. and so we had a seminar on taxation and benefits.

I learned two things sitting there,
1- The difference between tax exemption and tax evasion.
2- It is an absolute must to visit the rest room and then attend a 2 hour seminar.
After a great deal of explanation, it was an no-brainer that tax evasion was illegal, some various examples were cited..in the pretext of telling us what not to do, but from where I was sitting ( extreme end ) , I could see the slight wink every time he told us something illegal.
Thus we had my dad signing a receipt for rent for the house I live in, its just plain simple-fool proof, my parents charge me to live in their house. How hard can it be to explain it to the I-T dept if at all I am caught? Apart from all the illegal methods I came up with he told us, there were some actual legal stuff I could do, to avoid paying those greedy govt. officials, but I still don’t understand as to why I cant write off my shopping expenses and restaurant bills, aren’t those the most important things in life, roti-kapda-makan? But no, exotic trips, cars, travel, insurance, all were important..but not my food! Another thing I don’t understand is the major hype about life insurance... some people are proud to insure themselves for millions but at the end of it all, they don’t get the money, their family( or in some cases their pet ) gets the money, frankly speaking when I go( go as in die ), I want my family to be sad and to cry, and bagging say half a million will definitely make them list the pros and cons(the cons being minus half a millon) of me being alive, now wont it??

But the way I figure it, if I spend all my money as soon as I get it, the ‘guys’ cant ask me to pay them, cause, hey, I have nothing to offer! Its either that or go to the Himalayas and renounce the world, then come back a year later, write a book about the things you learned ( or make them up ) and hey, instant fame, fortune and funds ( my favorite f’s.. n for your information my favorite B’s are beaches, beer and beds [I sleep lots] )

All in all it was a decent seminar, at the end I had just one doubt I had to keep to myself due to reasons, the doubt being “Is there anyway I can end up paying more tax than what I earn?”…He left us with the caution that we should declare our investments/expenditures and then at the end of the year produce bills to support the same, being the spontaneous / at-the-moment person, I am not really sure on what I will spend my money on..so I think its really unfair of them to ask me…and thus I concluded ( in the words of Oscar Wilde) that I have nothing to declare except my genius…